Hi, my name is Jason Palmer. My friends call me JP. My ex bosses called me Palmer. My enemies just said, hey you!
Welcome to my therapy.
I’m told I have several problems. You know things like alexithymia (a personality construct characterized by the inability to identify and describe emotions in the self) and Oedipus complex (think Sigmund Freud and interpretation of dreams -- or so a bartender told me), and problems with social domination. So, in a nutshell, I’m advised that keeping a diary of my work and affairs might help me interact with normal people.
Here’s a bit about me…
My age is not up for discussion; I like that. Some people think I'm over 50 because of my wisdom and knowledge of history; others think I'm just 23 because of my technical creativity; while most customers just conclude that I’m middle-aged because of my arrogance and cynicism. And no, I don't work for Amazon, Google, or the death-star (AT&T).
Long ago, an instructor told me that my career would go through five stages:
Hot dog. The stage where you believe you're infallible and nothing bad can become you; you can do nothing wrong.
Identification. This stage is where you identify with a high-profile, television character or superhero if you would. Just like your counterpart, you swoop in and attack problems with no regard for collateral damage.
Cynic. You spend the majority of your career suspicious and questioning anything that is brought to your attention, especially something that might be too obvious.
The realist. A stage just prior to the end of your working career; this is the point where you decide and understand that there are limits to what you can achieve.
Self-actualized or retirement. This is the final stage where you know that your actions matter not. You are activated by your own imagination. You were not given cases because people believe you are no longer capable.
While I was a hot dog, a period that lasted only five days, I dove into cases, ignoring protocols and procedures. My technical skills were superior and I could do no wrong. The case of the "deleted emails” was by far my worst example. And, there was the case of the “Bulgarian coffee shop”. At some future time, I may describe my case notes for these adventures so you can see how bad the identification phase can be. I no longer work in the national defense team of a three-letter agency because of one of them.
As a quick note for readers, I give my cases names to protect both the victims and anyone directly or indirectly involved. As you read through my case files, you may be inclined to think you know who or whom exactly I'm referring to. You may guess it. But, you probably have no clue who the real players are because I have fictionalized them.
During my identification phase, I was the cool agent who swooped through the Internet superhighway driving a red-hot Ferrari. My hunches were always the best. I rarely paid attention to the cautions of field supervisors or senior agents. Instead, I played out my hunches; smashed down firewalls, cratered access control systems, and fingered bad-guys in hostile countries. Needless to say, a few politicians, lawyers, a couple of ambassadors and dignitaries were “touched” by my activities. The few that were capable of finding me, made certain my activities were quelled.
Now, I remain, lovingly, a major cynic. Almost every day, new cases are presented to me and I'm asked to hunt, dig, analyze, and find. I agree to take less than one percent of the proposals.
Oh, and, I’ve established an exclusive relationship with Cloud 10 Studios and Tortugero to publish my material. Don’t bother digging for their ability to connect to me as I communicate through yet another intermediary and they really don’t know where I am at any time.